Performance Anxiety in the bedroom is a common and powerful blocker of enjoyment and can actually destroy an otherwise good relationship. Here I want to address Performance Anxiety (PA) as it effects men, or in other words PA as a leading cause of Erectile Dysfunction. Women too of course, can be effected where PA gives rise to a condition known as vaginismus. But I will talk about that another day.
PA as a leading cause of erectile dysfunction or impotence can literally happen overnight. All it takes for PA to give rise to a lifetime of erectile dysfunction is just one single mishap. It could have been too much to drink, or maybe just a throwaway comment about your size or preparedness for intercourse, or perhaps it was a new relationship that you were worried about, the smallest thing can give rise to a single "failure" leaving a man wondering about his potency forever thereafter.
Do you see, for an erection to develop there must be no distractions whatsoever. What is required is pleasure, desire, arousal and excitement. With these emotions running high the blood supply to the penis increased and the man has an erection. It's like magic. Questions in the mind like is it hard enough, is it long enough, will I put it in now - any little niggling doubts at all will kill off the magic and erection process stone dead in the water.
And, another thing to remember. It is not your fault that this is happening and it is not her fault that its happening and it is very important that that be made clear and that you discuss it between yourselves. There is no room here for any blame games. Once negative thoughts begin to invade the bedroom it is extremely difficult to banish them. The thing can become a self-fulfilling prophecy and a vicious circle all rolled into one.
So what is the remedy doc? Today we are lucky -- we have two choices. Twelve years ago, we had only one. Which you choose depends on your circumstances. It does not necessarily have to be one or the other either, a little of both can also be very effective. Remedy number one is predominately for couples in a stable relationship and remedy number two is predominately for men not in a steady relationship.
Number one: Stop performing. If you, the man, are not expected to perform then you cannot have performance anxiety. This may take a week or two of practice of course but you the woman do all the pleasuring creating an erection and allowing it to die down until you are eventually confident enough with this. Now kneel over your partner, one knee on each side and place his penis in you vagina. Over the next few weeks move along from there. A sense of humour might also help.
Number two: Ask your doctor for a prescription for tadalafil 20mg. Take one a day for a few days. Then take on only on day you expect to be having intercourse. These should give you PA resistant erections and return your confidence such that you will not need to take them all the time. Please visit my website for more information and help.
PA as a leading cause of erectile dysfunction or impotence can literally happen overnight. All it takes for PA to give rise to a lifetime of erectile dysfunction is just one single mishap. It could have been too much to drink, or maybe just a throwaway comment about your size or preparedness for intercourse, or perhaps it was a new relationship that you were worried about, the smallest thing can give rise to a single "failure" leaving a man wondering about his potency forever thereafter.
Do you see, for an erection to develop there must be no distractions whatsoever. What is required is pleasure, desire, arousal and excitement. With these emotions running high the blood supply to the penis increased and the man has an erection. It's like magic. Questions in the mind like is it hard enough, is it long enough, will I put it in now - any little niggling doubts at all will kill off the magic and erection process stone dead in the water.
And, another thing to remember. It is not your fault that this is happening and it is not her fault that its happening and it is very important that that be made clear and that you discuss it between yourselves. There is no room here for any blame games. Once negative thoughts begin to invade the bedroom it is extremely difficult to banish them. The thing can become a self-fulfilling prophecy and a vicious circle all rolled into one.
So what is the remedy doc? Today we are lucky -- we have two choices. Twelve years ago, we had only one. Which you choose depends on your circumstances. It does not necessarily have to be one or the other either, a little of both can also be very effective. Remedy number one is predominately for couples in a stable relationship and remedy number two is predominately for men not in a steady relationship.
Number one: Stop performing. If you, the man, are not expected to perform then you cannot have performance anxiety. This may take a week or two of practice of course but you the woman do all the pleasuring creating an erection and allowing it to die down until you are eventually confident enough with this. Now kneel over your partner, one knee on each side and place his penis in you vagina. Over the next few weeks move along from there. A sense of humour might also help.
Number two: Ask your doctor for a prescription for tadalafil 20mg. Take one a day for a few days. Then take on only on day you expect to be having intercourse. These should give you PA resistant erections and return your confidence such that you will not need to take them all the time. Please visit my website for more information and help.
Dr Andrew Rynne
http://www.doctorrynne.com
Dr Andrew Rynne is a medical practitioner and writer. He has thirty years experience in treating Sexual Dysfunction but most particularly Erectile Dysfunction and Premature Ejaculation.